A Walk on the Wild Side
by CriticsCubby
Summary: He couldn't let it continue...not after seeing the possibilities.


**A Walk on the Wild Side**

**Disclaimer -** Don't own them, just taking them out for a short field trip.

**Summary -** He couldn't let it continue, not after seeing the possibilities.

**A/N -** Sometimes, you just have to let your imagination run wild. Pun intended. No beta. Not my best work.

* * *

It was hot out. Not the Death Valley kind of hot that's so dry that you feel like you instantly turn into a raisin when you step out your front door; it was New York hot. The smells of the city, normally at least somewhat pleasant, were replaced by the pungent odor of sweat and settled smog. There was only the whisper of a breeze and it was warm. It was the kind of day that you grabbed a book and curled up on top of the A/C vent on the floor until the sun set. It was _not_ the kind of day that you went to the zoo.

"There will practically be nobody else there, Watson, it's _perfect_!" Sherlock pleaded to Joan as she attempted to finish her cereal.

"You know the zoo just opened their tortoise exhibit and tortoises love the heat! We need to go, Watson. For Clyde." He was very serious, and she was having a hard time keeping a straight face.

"Sherlock..it's practically 1,000 degrees outside. We already have a tortoise...go watch him for a few hours and let me stay inside and not melt." She said between bites of Captain Crunch.

"Absolutely not! I want an up-close encounter with Galapagos Tortoises in the comfort of my own city." He said decidedly.

Joan groaned, stood up, and walked her now-empty cereal bowl to the sink.

"Watson...If you agree to go with me I will buy you a snow cone." He stated, as if that was the one thing that would seal the deal. Watson couldn't help it, she laughed.

Leaning against the counter, hands grasping the sides of the sink for support, Watson couldn't get herself together.

"A..._snow cone_? What on earth made you think that I was holding out for a snow cone offer?" She finally choked out.

"You love snow cones. You mentioned once that you hadn't had a decent one since moving in with me and it just so happens that the cart with the best snow cones in town will be parked right outside the zoo entrance today. I checked." He sounded almost hurt that she didn't take his offer seriously, it wasn't as if he had simply offered to buy her peanuts or something; he had done research!

"Seriously? You checked on that?" She asked, straightening up, it was true...she did love a good snow cone.

"Of course I checked." He scoffed.

"Wow. Well, I guess I can't say no to a free snow cone, can I?" She asked, smiling a bit.

"My thoughts exactly, Watson! We leave in ten." He said quickly and then exited the room, leaving Watson shaking her head and chuckling softly to herself.

…

Sherlock led the charge. He was practically charging through the less-crowded-than-usual streets of New York; a man on a mission...to see some tortoises. Watson couldn't help but laugh.

"What's that Watson?" Sherlock slowed to turn and ask.

"Oh nothing, Sherlock...just marvelling at your ability to keep pace in this heat." She covered.

"Yes, well, perhaps in the future you will take my advice and start accompanying me to the sauna for work outs. In the meantime, breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth. Buck up, Watson, we're very nearly there." He stated matter-of-factly and continued briskly forward.

Watson rolled her eyes and quickened her pace to match. This was going to be a long day.

…

"Fascinating." Sherlock uttered for the thousandth time.

Watson had enjoyed watching the tortoises for the first thirty minutes but it was hot and she was tired, so she opted to sit on a bench in the shade nearby until Sherlock decided it was time to move on. If Sherlock decided it was time to move on.

"Watson, where did you go? You're missing it!" He turned, searching for her.

"I'm here, Sherlock." She said, standing and walking towards him. "What is it?"

"You needn't sound so excited, Watson.." He said shortly.

"Ok, I'm sorry. What's going on?" She said, genuinely curious now, walking towards him.

"Do you see that farthest one, there?" He asked, pointing to a lone giant off to the side of the enclosure. It wasn't eating, it wasn't sleeping, it was just standing there. Alone.

"It looks depressed.." Watson stated.

"I believe _he_ is, Watson. You see, according to the plaque, there," he motioned to the large placard with a bunch of pictures and descriptions of the tortoises in the enclosure, "this one used to be in another zoo. He apparently had an entire enclosure, filled with females, all to himself. Tortoises do best in groups, Watson, and they typically do better with one male to several females. George, that's his name, over there doesn't have any females of his own. Thus, the depression."

"Aw, that's so sad." She said sincerely.

"Quite. I've been watching him for quite some time now and I find myself feeling more and more sorry for the creature, which is rather disconcerting." He pushed off of the barricade he had been leaning on and walked over to the bench where Watson was sitting before. She followed.

"Ready to go, Sherlock?" She asked tentatively; his demeanor had changed, he was almost forlorn and not wiggling at all.

"Watson, I've made a decision." Sherlock said quietly, hands clasped on his lap.

"About what?" She wasn't sure what to make of his tone, it wasn't quite excited but it wasn't sullen either.

"It's time that we got Clyde some company of the female variety. While I do not generally promote polygamy in the traditional sense, that twin experiment does not count Watson, a tortoise cannot be held to the same moral standards as a human." He was serious about this.

"I see. Where do you intend to put the new women in Clyde's life? You desk drawer barely holds Clyde, much less Clyde's significant others." She supposed it was a good idea, really. They were out of the Brownstone so often these days, working on cases, that she sometimes felt bad for Clyde being on his own.

"I've got plans for an extraordinary habitat for the roof during the summer months but they'll have to be moved indoors in the winter, of course. They can go in my room, if you don't mind." He stood up and began pacing excitedly as he spoke.

"So, now we're going to have an apiary and become...what are tortoise experts called?" She asked, standing up.

"I believe they are simply called 'Tortoise Experts'." He stated simply.

"Of course they are." She said, laughing lightly.

"So, you're on board, then?" He looked at her hopefully.

"I think it's a great idea! Maybe now Clyde can do something other than attempt to escape all the time." She reached over and touched his arm in affirmation.

"I'm glad you agree, Watson." He covered her hand on his arm with his own. "I've come to the conclusion that if living a solitary life is not ideal, and it is not, and there is a remedy for that, and there is, then why continue?" She didn't think he was talking about tortoises anymore.

"Ready for your snow cone?" He asked cheerily, dropping his hand from hers and starting towards the exit. "I need to get back to the Brownstone to start sketching the plans for the habitat so come along, Watson." He turned to see her still planted where he had left her. "WATSON!" He shouted and she snapped out of her reverie.

As they walked away from the tortoise enclosure and towards the exit, Sherlock was explaining the ins and outs of the habitat he had planned for Clyde and the girls. Watson was happy to see him excited and the habitat sounded amazing; Clyde and company would be in heaven.

Finally, she spotted the icy goodness of the snow cone cart just to the left of the zoo's exit and made a beeline towards it.

"You're buying, right?" She joked, as they neared the cart.

"You know I don't carry money, Watson." He said plainly, keeping his eyes forward.

"Of course you don't. So that whole bit about 'buying' me a snow cone was just a ploy, then?" She knew the answer already.

"Honestly, Watson, I'm surprised you didn't deduce that sooner. I'll have a cherry one, if you please."

Watson rolled her eyes, smiled, and pulled her wallet from her purse. Typical Sherlock.

-fin


End file.
